Gooseberry: Long Live the Underwear Fairy

My wonderful wife announced she was officially changing the name of the underwear fairy.

"What are you talking about?" I asked.

"You know how your daughter always goes up to complete strangers and tells them we leave candy for the underwear fairy?" she replied.

"Yeah, so?" I said.

"No one knows what the underwear fairy is, so I have to spend five minutes explaining it to them so they can stop looking at me like I was sick or something."

"What do you propose calling her?"

"The sock fairy."

At this point my other children chimed in with their opinions. But before I get into their comments, I think it is important to explain exactly what the underwear fairy isn't.

The underwear fairy is not a mythical creature that wanders around leaving presents in peoples' underwear. Nor is it a being that goes around only in its underwear, or one who picks up underwear left under someone else's pillow. The underwear fairy is not a sick and twisted individual in any way. In fact, the underwear fairy is quite helpful.

You know how you use up all your underwear and put into the wash then suddenly one day it all miraculously appears back in your drawer? How exactly do you think it gets there? The underwear fairy, of course.

In an effort to thank the underwear fairy for all she does, I have taken to leaving candy in my drawer specifically for her use and enjoyment.

"What? Change the name of the underwear fairy?" My oldest son, a terrific young man of great poise and stature, summed it up best. "We wouldn't call the tooth fairy the tongue fairy. That just wouldn't be right."

My second son, also a terrific young man, but one who tends to go off on tangents from time to time, put in his two-cents. "The only thing worse than the taste of blood in your mouth is the taste of your own blood in your mouth."

My wonderful wife and I are still trying to figure that one out.